You know sometimes i am convinced that i must be the most unusal person in the world. I had the troubling experience of attending a funeral for someone I have only met once. Although i didn't know this person that well, i was pretty emotional at the funeral. It was my boyfriend's grandmother... perhaps my sadness was for those who were mourning. I don't think that I know enough about her to miss "her" as a person, but i saw the effect that she had on these people and I hurt for them. I have never been able to watch people suffer and be sad and upset. I think that I internalize their pain and as a result i ache.

I also think that I need to do more research before i attempt to speak to spirits and to communicate with people. Some people surely do not want to be called upon just because you wish to speak to them. I had a somewhat troubling experience with this last night and I am not sure what to make of it. Perhaps my reasons were self-serving and this was a polite reminder to leave some things alone.